Blake from Glengarry Glenn Ross arrives at home after his
   meeting at the real estate office. He walks in through the
   front door and sees his family sitting on the couch, watching
   TV. The living room is cluttered and disheveled.

                       BLAKE
             What the hell is going on here?
             This place is a mess. Son, put that
             GameBoy away. GameBoys are for
             cleaners. I am not fucking with
             you. I had a terrible day at the
             office and now I have to come home
             to this. It's filthy in here.
             (Looks over at his wife). You call
             yourself a mother, you dirty whore.

                       WIFE
             I don't have to listen to this.

                       BLAKE
             That's right. You don't have to
             listen to anything because as of
             tonight, we're divorced. You heard
             me, divorced. Now you have just one
             week to save our marriage starting
             with tonight.

                       WIFE
             Oh, we're divorced again? Can't you
             just relax for once?

                       BLAKE
             I'll relax once this house is
             clean. And now that I have your
             attention, let's go over tonight's
             contest.

                       SON
             Another contest? Dad, do we have
             to?

                       BLAKE
             Shut up, you little prick. Now,
             tonight is going to be special.
             Tonight, you losers are going to
             clean this house. Whoever cleans
             the most gets a new pair of
             slippers. Second place also gets a
             pair of slippers, but not as nice.
             And the last place loser gets to
             sleep outside for the rest of the
             year.

                       WIFE
             Your son lost three toes to frost
             bite from sleeping outside last
             year.

                       BLAKE
             So win the slippers. Do you people
             understand what I'm saying? You've
             got mops and brooms. I paid good
             money for those cleaning supplies.

                       DAUGHTER
             That mop is weak.

                       BLAKE
             The mop is weak? The fucking mop is
             weak? You're weak. I've been
             mopping this house for fifteen
             years.

                       SON
             So why not just clean it again now?

                       BLAKE
             Fuck you! That's why. Only one
             thing matters right now: get this
             goddamn house clean. You hear me,
             you fucking maggots? Just remember,
             'A', 'B', 'C'. A, always, B, be, C,
             cleaning. Always be cleaning.

                       WIFE
             Blake, we all know our ABC's.

                       BLAKE
             Apparently you need a reminder. Now
             get in there and start scrubbing.
             You think all this dirt just walked
             in here by itself? This filth is
             just sitting there, waiting to be
             cleaned. (Looks to Son) Are you man
             enough to clean it?

                       WIFE
             Leave him alone, Blake. If we're so
             horrible, then why are you even
             here?

                       BLAKE
             You see this ring? I choose to be
             here! Now it's your choice,
             assholes. Are you cleaners or
             losers?
             (Looks at daughter) You think this
             is abuse? You think this is abuse,
             you cocksucker?

                       DAUGHTER
             Daddy!

                       WIFE
             Blake, don't call your daughter a
             cocksucker.

                       BLAKE
             You don't like it? Leave. I don't
             care. I can roll up my sleeves and
             clean this whole house in two
             hours! Can you? Can you? 'A,' 'B,'
             'C', you son's a bitches. 'A,' 'B,'
             'C'!

                       DAUGHTER
             God Dad, just tell us what you
             want.

                       BLAKE
             Don't play dumb. You know what it
             takes to clean this house. It takes
             blood and sweat. The filth is out
             there, you clean it and everything
             is fine. You don't, I got no pity
             for you.

                       SON
             But dad, we're hungry. Can we eat
             first?

                       BLAKE
             I left a pizza out in the car. It's
             delicious, and none of you get any.
             Why? Because pizza is for cleaners.

   Blake's cell phone rings and he turns to answers it.

                       BLAKE
             Hello? Uh, huh, yes sir. I'm sorry
             sir. Of course, I. I'll be right
             there. (Hangs up the phone). I'll
             be back in an hour. This pigsty
             better sparkle when I return or all
             you motherfuckers are sleeping
             outside this year.

   Blake starts to exit stage left.

                       SON
             But Dad, what about the pizza?

                       BLAKE
             The pizza is coming with me!

   Blake exits, while his wife, son and daughter resume their
   sedentary lifestyles.

                       END